My son is 28 now and was diagnosed with ADHD when he was 4 or 5 and then labeled gifted with a learning disability when he was 6. I found that the school worked very hard to help him but there was only so much they could do. My son successfully served in the Navy, is in college now, and currently touring Eastern Europe and Turkey until he starts a semester in Istanbul. I know how difficult it is when you feel your child could be doing better but I just want you to know that getting all As is not as important as we sometimes make it out to be. Let your child be who he is and he will be just fine. I fought, got therapy for, and tried to manage my son to good behavior and grades but I realize now that he was a smart child and stayed a smart child. Remember nothing will take away the intelligence and talents your child has. The important thing is that you raise him to be a good person and he will be able to deal with his ADHD as an adult. Children with ADHD have gifts that schools often cannot realize or handle. Work with the school and continue to advocate for your child as best you can but please try to remember that no one will be looking at your son's grades when he is an adult. Please take this note with the best intentions from a mom who's been there.

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My son struggled through school all his life. But because he wasn't a big disruption, he wasn't diagnosed with ADD until the 5th grade. His grades were average, so the school felt he didn't need a 504 at the time. Going through middle school was even more difficult for him, especially with organization and focus. He was still maintaining average grades, although those grades were not his potential. It was contantly a struggle with homework and he's always losing work. He's in 8th grade this year and the thought of high school was frightening. He would get absolutely no help there. I realized that a 504 was imperative or he was certain to fall behind and become so frustrated that he would want to quit. I set up a meeting with his guidance counselor and said that I wanted a 504 with him. I needed to provide proof of ADD diagnosis. A meeting was arranged with his teachers and it turns out that they agreed that a 504 would be the best thing for him. They all saw the difficulties he has - especially with organization and following multi-step directions. What the 504 does is puts all the teachers on the same page with the accomodations that he needs. The special education teacher also spends time assisting him with organizing. This plan will follow him into high school and I can be assured that he will receive help there. I am so glad that I finally spoke up and insisted that he receive the help that he really needs. It's never too late.

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