Hi! I can relate very well with you. I have 2 biological children --- a 17 year-old son with ADHD and a 15 year old daughter with ADD. Both were diagnosed during pre adolescent years. As most individuals with this condition, they are intelligent but under achievers in the academic arena. However, they are gifted in sports. My son skateboards and my daughter figure skates ... and both are excelling in their fields. Their individual sports have provided them with a venue wherein they can expend vast amounts of energy; and provide a channel wherein they can learn to focus. It hasn't been easy but it sire is a joy to see them operate in their giftings.

Oh, by the way, my 9 year old adopted son also has ADHD. And so does my husband. Is it a struggle to cope with all these? Yes... and I'm glad I found a forum wherein I can share my experiences ... and perhaps be an encouragement to somebody.

God bless.

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I'm worried that my son will be misdiagnosed. When I see him I see a boy who has a love for life and the energy to express it. His teacher this year has been a problem from the very beginning of school. I believe she can't handle his energy level so she is pushing that something may be wrong with him. He is not in any way a disrespectful mean or agressive child. He just doesn't seem to be interested in some of the subjects in school. It is hard for him to get started on writing projects and he enjoys making people laugh. He is very popular among his peers. He is often liked right away and makes friends very easily. So I don't see any problems with him. Due to his critical teacher he has had somewhat of a difficult year. I finally decided after her constant complaining to take him to a behavioral specialist. Can you believe she asked me the next day what the doctor had to say as if he was going to diagnose him right then and put him on some medication. That raised another red flag for me. Also she scored him very high on the Conner's Test to the point where I felt like she was just doing it on purpose.

I heard a radio program that discussed how boys get bored with school because it is geared toward girls. Boys are more active and enjoy a more stimulating environment. With that I found it odd that boys are more likely to be diagnosed with ADHD....a very disturbing correlation.

I am completely against medication. It is my belief that when you are dealing with matters of the mind medication just isn't the answer. How do you medicate something you can't see? It seems like the medications just slow the children down it doesn't really help them. In some cases I have heard the meds make the children like zombies. That is very sad and scary to me. Does anyone else have a similar problem?

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Mz Jonz said: I'm worried that my son will be misdiagnosed. When I see him I see a boy who has a love for life and the energy to express it. His teacher this year has been a problem from the very beginning of school. I believe she can't handle his energy level so she is pushing that something may be wrong with him. He is not in any way a disrespectful mean or agressive child. He just doesn't seem to be interested in some of the subjects in school. It is hard for him to get started on writing projects and he enjoys making people laugh. He is very popular among his peers. He is often liked right away and makes friends very easily. So I don't see any problems with him.

Having ADD does not necessarily mean that your child is a behavior problem. Yes, some children with ADHD do have behavioral issues but that is not always the case. My son and daughter both have ADD without the hyperactivity and neither of them are mean, disrespectful or aggressive. They also are well liked and make friends easily.

Having a problem or disagreement with the teacher is a separate issue from whether or not your child has ADD. Whether the teacher is right or wrong about some points is not the issue. You owe it to your child to find out if he does have ADD or ADHD. (Technically they are both considered ADHD but ADD is sometimes used to denote those who do not have any hyperactivity). You said that it is hard for him to get started on writing projects. That can be a symptom of ADD. Those with ADD also have a much harder time paying attention to subjects that don't interest them, those that they find boring. It might be helpful if you read the book, "Driven to Distraction" by Drs. Hallowell and Ratey. It describes what it is like to have ADD both in children and adults.

Your objective should not be to prove or disprove the teacher or doctor wrong but to find out the truth, Keep an open mind and educate yourself about the disorder from a reputable source such as the book I mentioned. It is widely respected among doctors and therapists who work with ADD. I understand that you are concerned about misdiagnosis and I don't blame you but you also need to thoroughly investigate the possiblity for your son's sake.

I heard a radio program that discussed how boys get bored with school because it is geared toward girls. Boys are more active and enjoy a more stimulating environment. With that I found it odd that boys are more likely to be diagnosed with ADHD....a very disturbing correlation.

Partly, that is because girls are more likely to have the ADD without the hyperactivity and they are often missed. Many times these girls are referred to as "airheads" or "space cadets". They are inattentive and easily distracted but rarely cause any behavioral problems. They may be quiet and spend a lot of time daydreaming. Since they don't cause any behavioral problems, their ADD is more likely not to be diagnosed. That was definitely the case with my daughter who was not diagnosed until she was 20.

I am completely against medication. It is my belief that when you are dealing with matters of the mind medication just isn't the answer. How do you medicate something you can't see? It seems like the medications just slow the children down it doesn't really help them. In some cases I have heard the meds make the children like zombies. That is very sad and scary to me. Does anyone else have a similar problem?

The medicines do not have to make your child a zombie. It sometimes takes a while to find the correct dosage and medication type that works best for each child. And some people are limited to the medications that their insurance will cover. My son, daughter and husband all take medication for their ADD. None of them are zombies and they have had positive experiences with medication.

Just because you cannot see something doesn't mean it doesn't exist. ADHD is a real condition and medication helps to control the symptoms. I can't see epilepsy but I know medication is helpful for seizures. Work is being done with PET scans and SPECT scans that show some differences in individuals with and without ADHD and with and without medication. In the future, it may be perfected to become a diagnostic tool but science is still learning about the brain and how it works. Some things we know and some things we haven't figured out yet.

Unfortunately, some individuals with untreated and/or undiagnosed ADHD will self-medicate with alcohol, marijuana, tobacco or other drugs such as cocaine or crystal meth. These substances can help to alleviate some of the symptoms of ADHD but at a great cost. The risk for drug abuse is much greater among those with untreated or undertreated ADHD than those who do not have ADHD.

Good luck with your son. I hope you will learn more about this disorder and keep an open mind. Share your concerns and questions with your doctor.

Elaine

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I agree with Elaine she states it very eloquently. Before you deem him ADHD you need to have him tested. Sometimes children that are gifted also demonstrate difficulties that have nothing to with ADHD ; and you really need a professional who specializes in this field to diagnosis him. If he is ADHD it has been my experience that medication does help; and I never seen anyone including myself to be a zombie if anything it calms us down our minds not our bodies to focus something we do not do very well with out a stimulant. You would think it would act like speed buit it doesn't and instead calms the mind down enough to focus at a task that is especially uninteresting to ADHD mind. I find in my own experience and I was diagnosed in my 40's that with medication and seeing a psychiatrist things began to make sense and I was able to function. If untreated it is really much higher chance to self medicate than take medication.(something I never really did). I am very ADHD and have a easy time writing ; but can't do math so his struggles with writing may have nothing to with ADHD

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I'm new to this site and ADHD. I have been reading all the posting on your child being gifted and ADD/ADHD. My son is in 2nd grade and on medication which has helped him greatly. Since he was in preschool we have been told he is very bright. He is above his grade in reading, writing and his math comprehension is beyond most of his class. His teacher has been allowing him to work ahead but only on his own. To do well, he needs the direction from an adult which he is not getting. I want to have him tested for gifted but the school seems more interested in saying he can't be gifted if he has ADHD. Any suggestions on what to do or what has worked for someone else would be appreciated.

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Perhaps a letter from your physician or psychologist stating that someone with ADHD can indeed be gifted and vice versa. It's frightening to me when the schools, centers of education, are so misinformed. I met a high school guidance counselor who had no clue that adults could have ADHD.

See if your school district has a parent advocacy organization. They have it in Florida, although it is not advertised so most parents don;t know about it. The parent advocate knows a lot about the law and special education, IEP's, 504 plans and the like. They will go to bat for you and your child. They have made a big difference for a lot of people here in FL who are trying to get help for their child in dealing with the school.

Elaine

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Your child is gifted - don't alter his/her brain patterns with drugs. These drugs were created by the non-gifted to make the gifted non-gifted. Don't drug your child!!! It is hard, that is why I am searching now. I am looking for help for the parents of gifted children, because we need help, as surely as those parents of other disabled children do. DO NOT DRUG YOUR CHILDREN! They have the right to experience the world without being drugged by their parents! The world is our problem, not our children. Let us band together and learn to take on the world together, but don't let the world take our children.

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I tell you, I have never been so frustrated in my life.

I have twin boys who are in the 7th grade; they turned 13 in September. They too are identified as 'gifted and talented' (have been since I can remember) and are currently in danger of being retained, held back in the 7th grade. Last week they were diagnosed with ADD without hyperactivity (by their pediatrician).

They did so very well through elementary school and have always tested exceptionally well ( PACT-advanced/proficient & MAP-top 5%). When entering middle school, they applied (and were accepted) to an academic magnet program. The program seemed like it would be a great fit for the boys. However, from the get go, there were problems. For the first time, there progress reports were a nightmare. It got to the point were I wasn't looking for straight A's, I was praying it wasn't all F's. It sounds extreme...and it was. There were problems at home with homework, projects, chores, pencils, paper, etc. Everything was a 'battle'. We had tried everything to get them 'on track', but to no avail. Interims and parent portal (used by parents to track a students progress) all told the same tale. All zeros led back to anything that required 'paper chasing'. Notebooks, signed forms (yes, they get zeros for that too), homework, etc. They test well...even on a semester exam. On the exam...100 in the class...a D. It surely did not make any sense to us. However, we were told "Middle school is a transition...it's boys...it's puberty...it's no big deal, they'll grow out of it." Unfortunately, we struggled for almost two years before a diagnosis of ADD without hyperactivy was made.

When I think about what we all have gone through, I feel so terribly sad for my boys. However, knowledge is power and we are all learning more each day. We cannot change the past and I am determined to enlighten us all so we can make the changes needed to insure that the boys can reach their full potential. The whole process and the lack of effective changes across the board have definitely put a strain on the family and have caused an untold amount of stress for everyone involved. I have already found so much useful information and have tried to slowly make changes in the household and how I respond to the boys. My husband is also doing his research and reading up on the topic so he too is well informed. Hopefully, I will be able to make some progress with the school. They haven't been too receptive to the idea of a 'talented and gifted' student having ADD. They belive they should have been identified at a much younger age. The comments I have heard over the last 18 months have lead me to believe that the school already knows what their 'problem' is. I truly feel they (the school) think it's an excuse (shaking my head) for the boys not to be 'accountable' for their 'shortcomings'. However, with all of the information I have gathered and the more I read, the better prepared and more confident I feel about moving forward with this process.

I will be my childs advocate and I will work hard to make sure that not only are my boys getting what they need, but also that the school is more aware of the diversity of all of their students.

This site is just the salvation I needed because I have never felt so alone. It's hard for anyone to understand the struggle ...

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John Taylor PhD, long time educator on ADHD, estimates half of the students in Talented and Gifted school programs warrant the ADHD diagnosis. My son was also in that category. He was ejected from the TAG program for not getting his assignments in. However, my diligent wife got him back in. By the way it was not until junior year in high school he was diagnosed. .

Also, law professor, Dr. Gary Chartier, wrote a great essay on grading fairly in which he says the only justifiable grade is one given on competency only (as opposed to getting assignments in on time or busy work)

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