I am so sorry to hear about all the pain each of you has experienced (those who have indicated you have), please though don't categorize all spouses as unfeeling and unsupportive. I am a spouse of a bi-polar, adhd person who cheated on me, mentally abused me (through major manipulation) and became verbally abusive to me and my children. I tried, really I did to see them through the darkness, but at some point as a spouse we need to determine just how much we can take. I made that decision and now I am being demonized for my decision, my spouse has a very selective memory and accepts no responsibility in the failing of our marriage. I am not saying all of you dx with these same ailments have done this to a spouse. . . but I am asking that you all think about what a spouse goes through. . . life is hard, friends get alienated, the bi-polar spouse's needs always come above your own and in my case. . . the family walked on eggshells so as to not "upset". This isn't a life for any party involved. Now my spouse will have time to focus on making the necessary changes, get the help they need for themselves and it is my sincere hope they get well. . . for our children's sake. See we aren't all bad people, just humans with limits and sometimes those limits are pushed and decisions need to be made for the sake of all involved.

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As I was reading your post it brought tears to my eyes. Over the past 2 years I have been dealing with depression and have been on several medications before my doctor diagnosed me with bipolar and add. Finally, I had an answer to why the meds I had been on previously would only work for so long and I would go back into that dark tunnel with no end. During this time my husband and I have had ups and downs. He always has a way of making me feel like I am the one causing our problems and that there is something wrong with me and he is perfect. Like your ex husband he took care of the trash, mail, cars and so on. I always feel like I am needy of him and that he doesn't need me. Reading your story has opened my eyes and I am realizing that I am not the only one going through this and I can make it in this world without him.

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