Hallowell's book Delivered From Distraction is a good start (and I got it on audio at the libray--audio is definitly more ADD-friendly). He has examples of whole-famliy ADDers and advice.

As for your daughter, I would NOT push the competition thing. I'm a teacher and it's just not developmentally appropriate. Most kids that age (including my own) do'nt like games where the winner or loser is that obvious. Games like HISSS and or Don't Break the Ice! or Hungry Hippo are all just fun to play and the winner/loser thing has less of a focus. You can work on the competition aspect after first grade.

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I am a single mom with ADD. My two children have ADD/ADHD (one of each). Our house is interesting to say the least. Sounds like your daughter is painfully shy. My niece is like that and one of my daughters (the one with ADHD). Punishing her to make her more competitive is not going to help matters any. However, getting her involved in say martial arts, which is not a competitive sport, will... there's a couple things that martial arts will help her with. First, allowing her to get out excess energy so she can focus (which may or may not be an issue of hers) and second give her the tools she needs to defend herself, especially if she is being picked on. This will boost her confidence.

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Hello Jennifer, I have had some of those struggles also. I have ADHD and so does my daughter. She is know a teenager but was diagnosed at 7. She was the opposite very outgoing and bossy but she was also kind and sensitive to others feelings. It was just hard because the energy is where she struggled. It would irriate others. In kindergarten she was known as the social butterfly and still that way today. And that can cause social problems too. My son is 7 now and he is very shy never wants to go to school. Quit T-ball ( he was very good but did not want people looking at him) has played Soccer he did well but now he said he doesn't want to play. He is happiest at home in his comfort zone. I am always keeping my eye on him because he sometimes shows signs of ADD but often he doesn't. But I have decided not to push him because it becomes a battle and I am learning to pick my battles. So I just wanted to wish you luck. Remember we can only do the best we can.

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I also just joined.

Both my DH and I are undiagnosed ADDers - you just know don't you!

Our 11 year old is the only diagnosed ADDer and live is more than a little interesting with him. We've been down the Ritalin road and been unhappy with it. He's now unmedicated and taking Royal Jelly. I'm not yet sure whether it's having any effect. We're in the process of looking for a suitable high school for him.

Our 13 year old daughter is undiagnosed but I'm sure is also ADD. She's been a teenager and completely hormonal since the age of 3 (!) and every waking moment is a challenge!

Our 17 year old son had early concentration problems but managed to overcome them with Royal Jelly which is why I'm trying youngest DS with it. He's now studying hard for final exams and wants to study medicine. Unfortunately I don't think he's going to make the grades.

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constantly! I was diagnosed as an adult and then shortly after we married my husband was diagnosed. Then came our two children and I thought maybe our youngest would be spared, but she wasn't. She was diagnosed this year after struggling in school. My children and I take meds, but my spouse doesn't. It is a real struggle to deal with this on a daily basis. My oldest---who's 10--is hormonal and when she doesn't take her meds it's a nightmare to be around her. My spouse is so hyper that we constantly argue because he's rushing me on everything. It drives me NUTS!

I'm so thankful I've found this website because I'm drifting these days.

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I know it sounds trite but it makes such a difference knowing you're not the only family where some days there can be yelling, hugging, tears, lost items, etc. - all in the space of 15 minutes! Both of our children have ADHD and are on Concerta and in therapy (elementary school and high school). My husband and I are self-diagnosed (but without a doubt) ADHDers too. We all know we need routines but it is not very easy to stick to the plan - though we make lots of efforts. Any ideas on how to remember the plan?? Both children are bright and athletic but struggle socially a lot of the time. Life can be crazy between all their activities (which they crave) and we both work full-time.

What holds us together is making sure we eat together most nights, lying time at night with our son, and me trying my best to be a peacemaker. Medicine makes a huge difference for our children too - especially the younger one. Good luck and I'm always open to ideas on how to manage the situation better.

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My family is also all ADHD: We call it the house of chaos. Generally speaking we don't have too many people over as they are generally overwhelmed by our mess, our creativity, and our intensity. All three of my children - 19,16, 10- are gifted LD with ADHD. The middle child is Aspergers. School is the killer. My Aspie girl will pick up a picture of herself at 4 and sigh and say "that's the last time I was happy". School has broken my children. I am a teacher myself - ( a really good one now that I have so much insight!!), and even so I find it difficult to get what I need from the school system. Our eldest has done quite well, and is in University. The Aspie and my 10 year old suffer everyday. The social issues are huge as well. We get support from Integra ( a community health org for families with LD children), see a psychiatrist, take meds., and do our best to stay afloat. I think if I didn't have ADHD myself, it would be impossible to keep it all going. As it is, I hate to be idle so I research while I watch tv., constantly looking for new things to try. I like the FlyLady, this magazine, LDonline, and the old Schwabb learning site that now has a new name. We've done sensory integration which was extremely helpful, special camps ( Camp Towhee in Haliburton ONtario) and specialized tutoring with Oxford Learning Centres ( this approach is the only way my younger two manage to stay afloat in school). My middle child, 16, is doing a co op placement - amazing. At home we constantly fight a losing battle with mess and clutter. No one seems to consistently remember to pick up after themselves and this is one area I simply do not seem able to make any progress.

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Hi,

I just read your post, and this is my 1st time on a web forum. I just wanted to reply.

Yes, there are other families out there like yours. My son was diagnosed at 5 years old (4 1/2 years ago), I was diagnosed 2 years ago and my husband was diagnosed 1 year ago. My youngest (a daughter) doesn't seem to have it - she does very well in school, is bright, she is very shy with adults/teachers but has many friends, is well-behaved........but, given half a chance, she will talk continuously, all day.

My son, like your daughter, also walked fairly early (at almost 11 months) and was talking very early. He is extremely sensitive, kind and thoughtful - very bright also. It's really hard to watch, when he just doesn't seem to fit in with the other kids at school. One day, recently, he came home from school, sad that other kids were picking on him, and wanted to learn "how to be mean, back", so that they would stop - but then said, "I don't know how to be mean." He just doesn't have that in him. Because of his learning difficulties, he seems to be getting depressed and has started calling himself , "Mr. Dumb" (even though, he has been tested by a psychologist, speech/language pathologist and an occupational therapist - and scored in the "superior range" in many areas. He is very creative and comes up with great ideas (he is just shy about sharing them) He loves to help other kids, (younger ones, ESL students, or special needs kids) as I think he knows what it is like to struggle and he seems drawn to helping others that struggle or don't fit in. He's been almost in tears before, when he sees kids teasing other kids at school. His weak areas are writing/printing and expressing his ideas in written form. (He is a very visual learner) He also struggles with disorganization, time management, distraction and focus. (All of which are made worse, because both of his parents do too! The chaos in our house doesn't help his situation and I feel so guilty about not being able to help him more - because I struggle so much myself.

I'd love to hear from anyone!

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