I have a very good friend with A.D.D.--she never calls people usually. She just doesn't use the phone that much. Also, she hardly ever finishes things. Her follow thru is really bad. So, don't feel bad. She is a very difficult person to get along with--but, i love her tremendously---she is so precious. She has lots of energy oftentimes and can be bubbly and joyous. She cares about rejected people, loves God, and is very visual, very observant, and quick-witted. She gets caught up in a lot of detail, which slows her down, and she has poor concentration at times. She doesn't like to write--never has written me a letter in 7 plus years, and she isn't that great a reader at all, and is terrible at math--but, she loves listening to the radio--especially Christian programs. I hope this helps.

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I can only speak for myself in that with me it is a social skill problem. I absolutely hate calling people because it gives me more of a chance to make a mistake.I would rather talk to someone face to face.Make sure you spend enough time AWAY from work doing something that you love because burnout can sneak up on you and you won't see it coming, thats what happened to me. Al

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I am new here...again desperate for a 'cure'. "Moses" you are talking about me! I am really uncomfortable socializing. It is a lot of work and takes a lot of time to have friends and be a friend. I even distance myself from family too. I never write notes or send thank-you's, rarely send b'day cards. Some of this is forgetfulness, some is procrastination, plus my writing skills aren't great to be penning a letter to someone else.

An mom from our church/school died last week from cancer. She and I were on a few committees together, and I used to see her frequently while she was in remission. I heard a few months ago that her cancer was back, and I thought about sending her a card or making her some food, however it is now too late. Once I heard this news I felt horrible. However do you think that I would learn from this situation? The answer is no. Similar situations have happend in the past and I never learn my lesson. I never learn to get off my butt and do it. I am 42 years old, when will I grow up?

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I'm a secretary and I have a hard time following through on things. I don't know how I made it as long as I have on this job. I do my work in a satisfactory manner, but when complex issues come up (which comes up often in this company of confusion that work for) it's hard for me to deal with them. Most of the time I don't until someone comes and ask me for an update. My new boss is a little more helpful than the previous one (although he was a very nice guy that let me get away with a lot). He's a little more organized and when he asks me to handle an issue he gives me step by step instructions on what he wants me to do. But still I get stressed and depressed. I'm looking to change my job to one that is more "ADD friendly". I'm looking to do something that I'm passionate about and that won't give me a chance to procrastinate.

If you do an internet search on the topic "careers for ADHD" or something similar, you can find some tips on what jobs are better suited for you.

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I could have written almost the same post. I'm currently in college and over half way done. Like you I take good notes but have a hard time bringing myself to study. I procrastinate until the last minute. With my job I have a hard time wanting to do extra. Maybe its burn out since I have been in the same field for 13 years. So I do understand where you are coming from. Can you maybe email your contacts? Maybe that would be easier than over the phone.

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I am currently in school, and I have two paper of 1500-2500 word essay to be done by Monday. How much did I do nothing. And this is my extension so if not done I will fail. I somehow will mange; but I hate to write ;for a subject that is not interesting to me My two week course class had 5 papers and I finished it because I loved the subject matter I think we have to think about what we want to achieve ; and the go for it. ADD extension in school helps. And write on calender when to call a friend or have them call you. I have my best friends calling me at different off hours so pick a good time

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I also have a problem with using the phone. I have informed my friends of this. Now they call me most of the times and I am learning that I can pick up the phone and call them with a question or anything else. Even just to check on them. As for consequences I am having trouble being impulsive because for some reason I just don't think about the consequences. Procrastination is a biggie for me. I do a little of this and a little of that and I hope it will eventually get done, but I can't stay on one thing at a time. Thanks

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I, too, have terrible follow-thru. I'm 46 and still have trouble getting things done --you should see my laundry pile!! I'm a stay-at-home mom of 2 very active, distractible kids (I have a diagnosis, they don't). I can't keep up because I get into one project, get this pit in my stomach, and move on to something else. I sometimes wonder if it's a fear of getting things done because I'd be bored without having a million things to do....

I also have trouble staying in touch with people, making phone calls, writing letters, etc. I've lost touch with many treasured friends because of this. When I worked, I used to put things off until I was backed up against a wall and had no choice but to pick up the phone....

I find that I have my better days since being diagnosed a year ago. I didn't do well on meds, so I've been working on cognitive behavioral therapy. I talk to myself ALOT -- sometimes I worry that I'm going to end end like some of those crazy old ladies you see on the street talking to themselves! Anyway, when I talk to myself, and really use my lists, I find I get much more done. Although, i'm still not great at staying in touch -- it has to do with not be able to figure out what I'm going to say most of the time.

I hope this helps!

Now, can anybody tell me how to schedule, and actually get to, the gym???!

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Follow through and procrastination are such common challenges for people with ADD -- even for many without ADD! There are many strategies and techniques that you can learn by working with an excperienced ADD coach. It also helps to have the accountability provided by a coach. At the most recent CHADD Conference in Chicago, I presented a workshop on How to Stop Procrastination Before it Stops You! It's actually a favorite topic of mine because I always used to consider myself the Queen of Procrastination!

Anyway...my point is that you "can" learn strategies to procrastinate less and follow through more. The key here is to be motivated enough to want to make some positive changes.

Rhonda Pawlan, M.S. AD/HD Coach

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Oh my, you have all made me feel so much better - and I'll be 50!!! I still have the unfinished alphabet hook rug that was supposed to be finished before my first was born - he will be sixteen in July! It wasn't done for the second, or the third. Maybe in time for grandchildren?

Mommysue - I know that feeling in the pit of the stomach, I get it all the time; especially when I get close to finishing something. It may not be out of fear of being bored so much as having a million other things encroaching on your mind. That's what happens to me, and that's why I end up stopping one project for the next. My filing is just like your laundry (I have that, too.). I haven't filed papers in four years!

Thank you all for letting me know I am not alone.

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