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Frank's an ex-TV writer, now sandwich-generation ADHD homemaker with a wife, two kids, a dog, and an eighty-something mother-in-law in a house that won’t stay clean. He writes here to try to figure out what’s going on there.

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Archives: August 2009

posted: Friday August 28th - 2:16pm

ADHD & Over-Compensating Disorder

Early on, my ADHD and I caused such havoc and disappointment that I developed a psycho-level work ethic to try to fix the things I was bound to screw up or forget before it happened.

“Dad, stop already. The microwave is clean enough. I want to make popcorn.” That’s my 13 year-old daughter, Coco. And she’s wrong. You have to use a scrubby sponge on the inside ceiling of the microwave to get all the little bits of chili and soup that get stuck up there. You don’t want one of those bits falling into your coffee when you heat it up,...
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posted: Wednesday August 12th - 12:26pm

A Deeper Look at Alcoholism and ADHD: Part 3

Across the kitchen counter from me stood my wife, Margaret, and our two children. If I didn’t get sober, they were gone. I started to say something, but something in all three of those faces shut me up.

So there I am in 1998, a mental breakdown putting me in the safe hands of the medical profession who are testing me six ways from Sunday to find out what’s wrong so we can change whatever that is and I can be all better. Truth was, though, I didn’t want to change, figure out coping strategies, make a plan, or you know, do any actual...
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posted: Tuesday August 11th - 11:13am

A Deeper Look at Alcoholism and ADHD: Part 2

None of my ADHD behavior seemed all that strange to me. When I peeked out at other people from inside my head, I noticed their reactions, whether I was drunk or sober. Man, they were so rigid and judgmental.

The definition of insanity is said to be doing something the same way again and again and each time expecting a different result. I think my particular insanity pattern throughout my life is doing whatever my next impulse says to and not even paying attention to the result. But at 49, in the middle of my breakdown, I didn’t see any pattern. I didn’t understand why...
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posted: Wednesday August 5th - 2:10pm

A Deeper Look at Alcoholism and ADHD: Part 1

The distracting ADHD noise in my head was the same whether I was a success or a failure. But martinis always muffled the chattering.

I’ve written a couple of times before in this blog about my alcoholism and its relation to my ADHD and hypomania and other scattered comorbid disorders I carry jangling around in my head like loose change. But I find the alcohol/ADHD dynamic to be a difficult, smoky thing to express and I always feel I don’t quite get it. So, I thought I’d give it another...
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