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ADHD College Blog

Will This Be on the Test?

Archives: June 2008

Workin' 9 to 5. OK... 9:10 to 5.

Day One of the summer internship was a resounding success - despite a few freak-out moments of feeling overwhelmed. All in all, I'm feeling quite grown up, thank you.

Today was a big day in my life as a grown-up. I finally started my first real job as an intern in the office of a small construction company. I didn’t mention my ADHD at the interview, because I’d rather try to work it out on my own, and learn to cope without accommodations at work.

This morning I was so proud of myself: I woke up very early, put on my professional clothes, and left (what I thought was) really early in case of traffic. As it turns out, I should have left 10 minutes earlier, because I arrived frazzled and stressed to my first day of work.

First set-back aside, I was thrilled when they showed me to my own desk, complete with office supplies, and lots of complicated gadgets that I had no idea how to use. Then, my worst fear came true; they gave me a huge stack of papers and briefly explained what I should do. I do not do well with spur-of-the-moment assignments; I like to have time to prepare to compensate for some confusion and slow processing due to my ADHD. Needless to say, I kind of freaked out for a few minutes, until I settled down, and looked through the papers which I discovered were a set of floor plans for a new building. After what felt like 3 hours (but was really only 20 minutes) I had taught myself how to use some of the odd-looking tools (a ruler used to measure the building plans drawn to scale, a T-square to draw and cut straight horizontal lines, and an industrial stapler) and I had completed my first assignment.

The rest of the day continued in a similar fashion, until they said I should go home for the night. My first day in the real world was overall, a success. My ADHD didn’t hold me back at all, and I learned that I can be successful if I have confidence in my abilities and take the time to slow down and look before I leap (or run away from things that at first seem scary).

Was Woodstock Like This?

The physical and emotional release of dancing and singing — high-pitched, out-of-tune, and soaking wet — all day long at a festival concert was amazing.

A few weeks ago, I discovered the perfect place for an ADHD person like me. It was loud, energetic, upbeat, and the focus shifted every 15 minutes. While these adjectives are often used to describe me, I use them to describe an all-day concert hosted by KISS 108, a local radio station.

My sister and I recently went to the annual KISS concert in Boston, an outdoor extravaganza featuring some of our favorite bands playing a few songs each for eight hours straight. When we arrived (almost on time), it was beyond crowded. We immediately jumped into the action, singing and dancing like crazy to Jesse McCartney, Maroon 5, New Kids on the Block, and my sister’s favorite, the Jonas Brothers, plus tons of other acts.

Halfway through the day, it started to pour. However, my adrenaline was pumping, and I was feeling great (I could finally act out how I always feel inside... like I’m ready to burst!) so I pulled on a poncho and danced and sang through the rain storm.

Eventually, the concert started to clear out as it got dark and cold. But there were so many things going on, and I couldn’t imagine missing one minute, or one song. Luckily for me, my non-ADHD sister didn’t get annoyed with my obnoxious singing and dancing... she kept up with me right until the end, until I crashed into bed at 1 a.m., never having felt more exhausted or satisfied in my life.

The Smell of Red Bull In the Morning

This semester, I tried to turn over a new "cramming" leaf. Turns out the old leaf wasn't so shabby.

It honestly baffles me that people can study for exams weeks or even days before the test. No matter how hard I try - making schedules, setting timers, going to the library - it seems impossible for me to seriously accomplish anything until I face a panicked rush to the finish. I know it’s not healthy, but my study skills are fueled by energy drinks, coffee, adrenaline, and the fear of looming failure.

I wish this wasn’t the case; in fact, it’s been the biggest struggle I’ve faced in college, possibly in my life. I see my non-ADHD friends working on papers weeks before they’re due, when I can’t seem to even remember I have an assignment until 11 p.m. the night before. This semester during finals I got a math tutor, scheduled a time to meet, wrote it down, and deleted the e-mail so I wouldn’t be tempted to cancel at the last minute because I just ‘really wanted to watch this one show on TV.’

I did go to the meeting, so I can successfully say I studied for that entire hour a week before my test. The night before the exam came, and even though I had put in those extra hours, I found myself facing a new problem; I was so anxious about the test that I had myself convinced I didn’t know anything, making it impossible to sleep. The longer I lay awake, the more panicked I got until eventually I just took out my books and did practice problems all night.

The next morning I went to the exam, nervous as always... and completely bombed it. Seriously, it was a crash-and-burn situation. There’s just something about calculus that I don’t get; no matter how many formulas I memorize, when it comes to the exam I can’t apply any of them to the questions that are asked. Maybe something in my brain will click the next time around. If at first you don’t succeed... call the tutor again.