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Our After-School Routine

Any change--even changes for the better--can be stressful for our kids with ADHD.
ADHD Parenting Blog | Friday April 10th - 9:26am | More April 2009 Blogs
 
Parenting ADHD Children blogger Kay Marner is mother to an ADHD daughter in Ames, Iowa

I know that kids need consistent schedules. But doesn’t that apply mostly to preschoolers? That’s what I thought. But, at age 8½, Natalie still reacts negatively to changes in her routine. I suspect that Natalie’s need for consistency is intensified by her ADHD.

I’m in my third week of stay-at-home motherhood, since quitting my part-time job. Nat’s last day at daycare coincided with my last day of work, and now she rides the school bus home to me, instead of going to daycare.

Natalie claims to be happy about this change (“I hate baby daycare!”) but you’d never know it, based on her behavior.

She bursts through the front door each afternoon in full-throttle Natalie mode, drops her backpack (she’s supposed to throw it in her locker) and then...goes nuts. Some days she demands that I make a friend appear, instantly, out of thin air, for her to play with. She acts crabby--I interpret that as hungry--but she refuses to have a snack. For the first few days she had big ‘ol out-of-control physical fits within minutes of coming home.

Wait a minute. Being home for my children--wasn’t that supposed to be a good thing?

I’m working on developing an after-school routine. I meet Natalie at the door, and remind her to put her backpack in her locker, not just dump it on the floor. I have her go potty. I offer her a snack. If she doesn’t want the snack right away, I tell her that I’ll offer it again soon. Then, it’s time to play--the more actively the better, preferably outdoors--until suppertime.

Each day gets a little better. After three weeks, I think that both Natalie and I have adjusted to our new routine. Yes, having Mom home really is a good change. This transition just served as a reminder to me that any change--even changes for the better--can be stressful for our kids with ADHD.

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2 Comments:

  • Posted by NYMom23 - Apr 14 2009 @ 8:54 AM
    After School Routine
    I,too, quit my job to be at home with my kids. The transition was not just tough for them...it was tough for me, too! Creating routines for all of us was difficult but worth every seocond of effort. One thing I do for my ADHD child is create routine cards with rewards built in. This gives him a visual tool with clear guidance for his routines. Rewards can be simply an extra 20 minutes at bedtime, extra time on the computer or a little treat from a goodie bag which I pick up little odds and ends at the dollar store. I found a website which makes creating routine cards really simply. It's sort of a point, clink and print site. I highly recommend it for any parent wishing to creating routines and providing consistency in your day. The site is www.myadhdconnection.com It costs $1 for the first month - can't beat that!
  • Posted by Jenn - Apr 10 2009 @ 3:24 PM
    i totally agree!
    my kids do so much better with routine. I have to admit, I do too. That is why I hate school vacations!!! It's no vacation for me. I don't know it would help because Natalie is older than my boys but a schedule on the wall, (for my 5 year old) I need pictures. But I think it helps them organize better and while we don't look at it every day, it helps that it's there especially on the days he seems more off than usual. it really helps with transitioning, i think. the other day, my son made his own schedule and it looked pretty good.
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