Sometimes, no matter how candid we attempt to be with ourselves, it's difficult to evaluate the motives behind our actions. I've always been plagued by a compulsion to get to the very beginnings of a subject, to approach things ab ovo, so to speak.
If I'm interested in Gothic cathedrals, I feel as though I'm cheating, if only myself, by reading about Gothic cathedrals until I've read about Romanesque basilicas. Of course, this creates a compulsion to read about Roman architecture, which leads me to Greek architecture. Along the way I get totally sidetracked: I look something up in the dictionary. After that, all bets are off. I'll find a definition for "boustrophedon," (You look it up; I'm way behind schedule already.) a really cool word, and I'm done.
So this urge to start at the beginning, as admirable as it might be heuristically, creates nightmares for those of us with faulty impulse control and attenuated attention span. We, or at least I, wind up getting nothing done. All or nothing is a recipe for disaster.
I'm trying to get out of this maze by focusing on doing one thing at a time, no matter how long it takes.
I'll get back to you on this one. It'll take a while.
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