Connect
GO

Feed

Douglas Cootey, a single father to four daughters, works hard to meet the challenges of managing depression, ADHD, and chronic motor tic disorders. He describes his frantic but fun-filled life surrounded by his loving daughters as a “living sitcom.”

posted: Wednesday June 24th - 9:00am

My Saving Grace: People Who Get That I Have ADHD

When my daughters constantly remind me about keeping track of the car keys, I am thankful—not defensive.

ADHD Forgetfulness: Thank You for the Reminders
“Do you have your keys?” I swear, she asks me every time. Every. Single. Time. I shut off the car, get out, and my youngest asks me in panic, “Do you have your keys?” Hey, give a dad a break already! There was that one time that I locked the keys in the car. OK, maybe more than one time, but how many years ago was that? Yet she...
Continue Reading »
posted: Friday June 12th - 11:12am

My Daughters Think I Hate Them

Many parents with ADHD wear their intensity on their sleeve. Here’s how to lighten up to let the good times roll.

Emotional Intensity and Parenting with Adult ADHD
Years ago, when I was a 30-year-old child learning how to be a parent, I ruled my home with The Voice. It was challenging enough to be a stay-at-home dad amid the pandemonium of raising four girls, but I was also a disabled adult with ADHD. Pandemonium meant mental confusion, and mental confusion meant I made mistakes. I cut through the commotion with a voice that...
Continue Reading »
posted: Wednesday May 20th - 9:28am

Why My Stuff Goes Missing and How I Get It Back

Three steps for avoiding wild goose chases looking for a button, wallet, and keys.

Tips for Staying Organized with Adult ADHD
Once upon a time there was a button on my pants. Then I ate something that I was so allergic to that my body swelled up like an orca on a tuna binge. I gained almost 10 pounds. After a few weeks I worked it all off, but I had a new problem. My button had popped off my suit pants while I was doing my...
Continue Reading »
posted: Monday May 18th - 3:35pm

Stop Guilt Attacks Now: My Four-Step Plan

Why do we feel bad about ourselves when we can just shrug it off and live to fight another day?

Insecurity in Adults with ADHD
Adults with ADHD have challenges with chronic insecurity. Perhaps it is from a lifetime of being reprimanded for “stupid” ADHD mistakes and behavior. I can’t relate. I’ve never had an English teacher mock my essay, which missed the point of the assignment, out loud in class—while standing next to me during the worst parts. I can’t relate to that hot feeling you get in your ears...
Continue Reading »
posted: Monday March 23rd - 9:00am

Exploding Eggs: What Can Happen When You Fall Out of Your Routine

When life throws distractions at me, I drop the ball in a big way. Do you?

ADHD in Adults: The Importance of Routines
My family watches a religious conference on television every fall. The last time I watched, my 15-year-old was sick at her mother’s, so it was just my 12-year-old and I for the day. After the conference was over, there was an ad on TV in which a dad learned to take time out of his schedule to play catch with his kids, tie on and all...
Continue Reading »
posted: Tuesday February 10th - 2:01pm

Promises, Promises: Why I Broke Them and How I Keep Them Now

When it took me three years to refurbish a dollhouse for my youngest daughter, I decided not to let her down again.

ADHD Procrastination
Of all the negative aspects of ADHD, the worst for me is the long list of broken promises I have made to my daughters. “I'll give you one art lesson. I'll take you on a trip. I'll find it for you. I'll fix that toy.” I don't mean to break promises, but life happens, we get busy, and things I always meant to do get left...
Continue Reading »
posted: Tuesday December 23rd - 2:54pm

The Kids Are Alright. But I’m Not.

When it's my turn to take the kids, I'm a master of routine. When they visit their mom, things fall apart.

I focus here a lot on ADHD hijinks as a single dad raising kids, but my girls aren't always with me. Many divorced parents deal with times when their children are with the other parent, but this on again/off again parenting wreaks havoc on an ADHD adult's rhythm. I rely on my daughters' school schedule to help me stay on task: I wake up at right...
Continue Reading »
posted: Friday October 3rd - 11:17am

Boredom x ADHD = Depression

ADHD adults and ADHD children often develop the blues when they are bored. Here’s how I, and your child, can fend off feeling down.

ADHDers often experience depression after success. This usually occurs when the clarity of hyperfocus passes after completing a project. The noise and mental muddle returns, and, on their coattails, depression. For me, with a comorbid condition of depression alongside my ADHD, the “depression after success” syndrome triggers a major depressive episode if I don’t prepare for it. What about ADHD girls, who tend to be more inattentive...
Continue Reading »
posted: Tuesday September 2nd - 1:03pm

My Big Fat Oreo Experiment

The cookies I baked for my daughter tasted like crud, but I had fun doing it. Let’s hear it — really! — for the joys of ADHD impulsiveness.

Kitchen recipes
Sometimes life's lessons come in somber robes with majestic fanfare and dramatic lighting. For me, however, life's lessons arrive in a clown car that just ran me over. I’m not complaining. The randomness that ADHD introduces into my life is often entertaining. I’ve learned to go with it. Sometimes the randomness yields new adventures. Take a recent shopping trip. I had three things on my shopping list...
Continue Reading »
posted: Sunday July 27th - 1:46pm

Teaching My Kid to Cope: Lessons from an ADHD Dad

When my ADHD daughter came to me with a problem, I swore I would be there for her this time, and not wing it.

Dad and Daughter
One of my daughters recently confided to me that when she is bored, she gets depressed. Unfortunately, she confided just as I was getting ready to leave, preparing my other daughter’s medicine, and thinking about dinner. I froze in panic. This conversation now? But, but, but… I let her know that I understood what she was experiencing and that I wanted to talk to her about it...
Continue Reading »
« Family Guy

« All Blogs

 

Archives

Copyright © 1998 - 2015 New Hope Media LLC. All rights reserved. Your use of this site is governed by our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy.
ADDitude does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. The material on this web site is provided for educational purposes only. See additional information.
New Hope Media, 108 West 39th Street, Suite 805, New York, NY 10018