My husband was diagnosed with ADHD five years ago and has kept quiet about it. Our teens know, but I feel closed off from the support I could get from friends and family if we let them in on the secret. What should I do?
by Melissa Orlov
If your teens know about their dad's ADHD, then it's possible that others know it, too. Sit down with your husband and tell him that you feel you need help working through the challenges his ADHD brings to the relationship. Tell him whom you plan to discuss it with, and reassure him that your intention is not to hurt or denigrate him, but to get the support of others in dealing with his ADHD. It's important for non-ADHD spouses, particularly women, to develop a network of support. Women need to talk things out to resolve them. Choose your advisers carefully, though, and stay clear of people ready to make pronouncements about what you should or shouldn't do.