Is My Ex Too Strict With Our ADHD Child?

"Thanks to medicine, schedules, and caring teachers, my 6-year-old is doing well at school and is making friends," one reader tells us. "But I'm concerned about her dad's parenting style (we're divorced), which seems harsh for a young child."
The Experts | posted by Michele Novotni, Ph.D.

It sounds like you've worked hard to get a handle on managing attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADD/ADHD). For whatever reason, Dad isn't on board. His resistance may be due to a lack of information, disagreement with the approach, or a need to be in control. If he needs more information about ADD/ADHD, sharing what you've learned, and passing along books and articles, may change your ex's attitude. You might consult a third party, perhaps a psychologist, to help you come to an agreed-upon approach.

If all else fails, you can work with your daughter, directly before visits. Set up a behavior management chart (with rewards when she gets back to your house), or coach her for situations she may encounter while at her dad’s. Be sure that she's being given her medication while she is with him.

Michele Novotni, Ph.D., is the former president and CEO of the national Attention Deficit Disorder Association (ADDA), a best-selling author, a psychologist, a coach, a parent of a young adult with ADD/ADHD, an ADDitude magazine writer, and a contributor to ADDitude's new ADHD Experts Blog.

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