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Jane D., a professional writer with ADHD in her early 40s, blogs about dating and relationships, working and losing a variety of jobs, and surviving and thriving with attention deficit, along with depression and anxiety. She lives and works near a big city on the West Coast.

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Archives: April 2010

posted: Friday April 30th - 6:00pm

How to Find a Healthy ADHD Relationship (My Work-in-Progress Guide)

I'm still seeing the ex-Boyfriend, but I'm becoming increasingly aware of what I want, and how he is unable to meet those needs, and how, someday I'll find what I'm looking for.

Sometimes it is better to leave the milk in the refrigerator rather than taking it out and revisiting it. If one takes the milk out too many times there is a risk of it spoiling, and who wants to drink spoiled milk? That pretty much sums up where I am with the ex-Boyfriend. He could change. It could change. The relationship could work. But in...
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posted: Thursday April 22nd - 3:15pm

Is Emotional Pain Worse Than Physical Pain? And If So, What's the Best Way to Treat it?

A lecture on the link between depression and heart attacks got me thinking about why -- when I seem to have so many things going for me -- I am still so unhappy.

A friend and I went to a lecture at a ritzy hotel on Sunday, where a scientist from an Ivy League school entertained (some of) us with a lecture titled, "What comes first, depression or a heart attack?" After stuffing my face with complimentary finger sandwiches and scones, I listened intently to her talk, wondering, in the end, who would really know? Sure, they could churn...
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posted: Tuesday April 20th - 5:00pm

Traveling for Work: The Best Adult ADHD Treatment/Job Duties?

My latest travel adventure was a remedy for the frustration I’ve been feeling from the winter doldrums (read: breakup), and work (more specifically: the feeling of being trapped in a world of technology and information).

I am back in Gotham again after a hiatus, or shall I say a getaway disguised in the form of a rare business trip. After enduring a marathon 14-hour flight to China (the secret to surviving is watching six movies, sleeping for four hours, and snacking for the remainder of the time), the trip was a much-needed escape from what has been, overall, a rocky winter...
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posted: Friday April 9th - 1:30pm

Self-Sabotage and ADHD Relationships: Why Am I Attracted to Unstable Partners?

I might be back together with the Boyfriend. Yes, the same one who walked out on me. Are we flirting, or actually dating? Can he be there for me emotionally, or am I just perpetually attracted to, and holding out hope for, the "wrong" guys?

The Friends are upset. For weeks I was convinced that the (Ex) Boyfriend was gone, and then he resurfaced in the form of an e-mail, a text, and the banter that I contributed to. Like a heavily obese person who can't control her compulsive overeating when the humming of the vending machine tempts, when he initiated the slightest bit of communication, I caved into my overactive...
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