Feeling Antisocial? Alone? Both? 3 Common ADHD Friendship Challenges

"Going out to dinner sounds great when I’m setting it up, but I don’t feel the same way in five days." How to find friends, keep commitments, and build lasting relationships.

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Friendship Problem: "I Don't Have Time to Keep in Touch"

I get angry voicemail from my family and friends because I can’t stand to answer my cell phone. I prefer to talk face-to-face or to text. I usually unplug my house phone when I’m busy, because I hate being bothered when I’m organizing my things or making a to-do list. I want to be more outgoing, but I don’t have the time or the energy for it. I have two best friends, whom I’ve known since third and fourth grade, who accept me as I am.

Tell friends and family about your preferences for communicating, and explain the reasons for them. They might be able to make a quick call and get right back to work, but you can’t. The interruption takes you off task. When you are working, it is OK to turn off your phone. Let friends know that you unplug it when you are busy, and that you will text them when you take a break or have lunch. In your outgoing message, ask people to text you instead.

If you want to be more outgoing but don’t have time for it, try partnering with someone for an activity that you are already planning to do, like going to the gym. If you plan to take your kids to the zoo, invite another mother and her child to come along.


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TAGS: ADHD and Relationships, ADHD Social Skills, ADHD Communication Skills

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